You see, my first two children each turned the world on its head for me, and I love them eternally for it.
To Caroline, I tell her, "I love you forever, my very first baby. I was never a mommy until you came, and you taught me how to be one. You are my heart." And I kiss her firm, round cheek until she starts to stir and I tiptoe quickly away.
To Amelia, I say, "My sweet Mercy, I love you always. I am so glad Jesus gave you to me. You teach me the gospel every day and I never would've known God adopted me without your life preaching to me all the time. Dear God, please let her life preach always." And I kiss her small, soft cheek until she snorts big and starts to snore loud, and I laugh and leave.
My first two children made life begin afresh for me. They each opened up new worlds to me.
And I was a little curious whether this third child could really change my life the way my first two had.
And then I went to the doctor yesterday.
I saw a miraculous new life stretching and swimming. I saw the profile of a nose curved much like Caroline's. I saw strong leg muscles like Brad's, and a tiny heart beating strong. And...
I saw a little dangle between the legs. :)
IT'S A BOY!!!
A boy busting his precious way into our world filled with baby dolls, pink and purple pipe cleaners, and hair bows.
I am giddy in a way I haven't been since Amelia came home to us from Uganda. It's that kind of excitement that only comes when the best kind of change is peeking over the horizon. I spent an hour sorting "sparkle beads" with the girls for their craft drawer, smirking at the realization that I'll probably never sort sparkle beads with this new little guy growing inside of me. (Although, he will share a VERY girly bathroom!)
|I'll have to buy this poor boy some dinosaur bath towels. :)|
I haven't the slightest idea what to do with a boy.
But I know that each night, after he falls asleep in his crib, I'll kiss his smooth cheeks and whisper proudly, "I love you, my very first baby boy..."
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