Looking for Miracles

Months ago, I was desperate for a sign from God. For a wind of change. For Him to point me in the direction of something terrifying and great and glorious.  What I got instead was a retreat with 11 other ladies, and an hour alone in the woods.

During that hour, I heard birds chirping and Bible pages turning – not exactly the thundering voice of an Almighty God. I could see a shimmering lake, towering pines, and, in the distance, a sweet sister in Christ on her face before the Lord… absolute beauty.

And then, God whispered.

It was as if He was telling me, “What? You need signs that I am at work? Open your eyes; signs are all around you! You need to know My will for your life and ministry? Read the Bible in your lap!”

But chirping birds felt ordinary and the Bible seemed predictable. I was asking for the miraculous. I pressed. “You’re a God of miracles!” I said. “I am begging to be sold-out for You! I will do whatever You tell me, if you’ll just TELL me! Give us a dream, or an offer we can’t refuse, or a clear direction! We will sell all, we will move, we will sacrifice, we will do whatever. Just tell us!”

And what I felt Him reply cut me to the core.

It was as if He said, “Baby of mine, you don’t even know Me that well.”

And I ached, because I knew He was right.

But He didn’t leave my yearning heart without direction. “Yes, I am a God of miracles. But I am also the Creator of what you call ordinary. Have you forgotten? The Bible is a miracle. Learn it. My Spirit living in you is a miracle. Rely on Him. Your ‘ordinary life’ is drenched with My blessings; open your eyes! The only thing keeping your ‘ordinary life’ from being extraordinary in Me is that you must first die to your selfish desires and SEEK ME – even in the mundane.”

It sounds beautiful, doesn’t it?

But I felt deflated. That was my big answer? Simply, read my Bible and seek God in even the secular and mundane?

Then I remembered our adoption process… how our WAIT turned out to be half of the prize, half of the beauty, half of the glorious journey to the presence of God. Sure, God is a God of miracles. But sometimes He wants the miracle to first simmer for a very long time. It is in the simmering that we really get to know Him. And He is the ultimate goal, after all.

And so, I returned to “life as usual” with resolve:

       To plunge daily into God’s Word. To love it and learn it and hunger for it.

       To be content right where I am. To be a good steward of the current life I have. Even those areas that seem entirely secular and meaningless. After all, God will never give me greater responsibility spiritually if I am wasting the situations I am currently in.

       To teach. To learn. To serve. To love. Increasingly.

Have I failed? Repeatedly.
Have a grown? Exponentially.
And how has this happened? Through His Spirit guiding me to seek Him through unremarkable routines.

I now see that each day holds a thousand miracles. I still wish for something bigger for my life. I am still praying for it. But I am satisfied whereever I am as long as I get more of SomeONE bigger.

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