If you haven’t read Amy Block’s post about “reluctant husbands,” it is worth your time to read. No, Brad is not reluctant about adoption. He is in love with Amelia. But Amy’s post showed me that my materialism could be a major hindrance to Brad’s ability to chase after all that God calls us to in life.
Lately, jewelry has been a big topic of my joking with friends. As girls, we superficially love some bling. Since many friends are now pregnant or engaged, there is ample opportunity to discuss “Push Presents,” anniversary gifts, and other jewelry.
Before you start thinking that we’re sinful and graspy, remember this: There is nothing wrong with appreciating jewelry. There is nothing wrong with owning it and loving it. I bet that even Jesus can appreciate the sweetness of a gorgeous piece of jewelry given by an adoring husband.
Still, my heart has been convicted lately.
Because I am more materialistic that I want to be.
You see, as much as my jewelry conversations with friends are a joke, I still walk away hoping for a certain 5 year anniversary present. And as proud as I get that I’ve spent so little on clothes in past years, my heart reveals that it wants, wants, wants the best fashions out there. And as much as I wish for our lives to be extraordinary for Christ, I also want to keep our big house, and someday actually fill it up!
Yet, when I close my eyes and imagine who I’d be if God TOTALLY set me free, all of the material things go away. I picture myself owning little, giving much, and feeling peace. Part of me actually aches for that. The other part of me? Well, it’s materialistic.
So how do I ever get the GOOD part of me satisfied? How does my life become all that it could be in Christ – all that I ache for? And how do Brad and I ever get on the same page about what that life looks like when I am begging for radical Christianity out one side of my mouth, while materialism spills out the other?
Here’s the answer:
It won’t happen.
I can’t have both.
Having both is impossible.
We have to pick the good. Only the good. We can only run towards Christ. We have to lay our selfish desires at His feet, and let Him free us. What is a ring, or a big house, or a great outfit, compared to being IN STEP with our loving Creator? Can you imagine with me how it will feel when we are free!? Jesus, let it be soon.