And happily, I missed God. Okay, that sounds very dark. Why am I happy to miss God? I was traveling and not spending the kind of time with Him that I had been before being on the road. What is good about that?
I'm glad I missed God because my sick nature is to completely forget about Him. Sure, I tried to muster up the will power for a string of quiet times -- and then trail off without even noticing. This year, though, God has been opening up to me the beauty of a RELATIONSHIP with Him. I love Him like never before. And finally, I am learning to miss Him... even before my whole world falls apart as a reminder that I need to come back to Him.
This is COMPLETELY the Holy Spirit in me. I never felt this before. It is not my own goodness. I have seen how badly I fail to love God in my own power. So if you are struggling to love God, just tell Him! He can change your heart so that it's in your new nature to chase after Him like He chases after us. It is a beautiful romance. I pray God would change my heart EVEN MORE to love Him more fully.